The Boys Are Back In Town!

I hope my husband's eyes never find their way to this post. He would die; just die. I've been browsing online all weekend in my downtime for Easter inspiration outfits for Henry. I can't say that I tried very hard because I still don't have a 'big' idea as to what I want to get him to wear this year, but I will say that I've found some super cute inspiration photos for some spring outfits.

LOVE everything about this except for the slouch beanie; I'd have to trade it in for a fedora or newsboy hat. Check out those adorable socks too! I have everything to complete this outfit except for the cardigan and possible hat so it must be fate!

Okay...so clearly Henry needs some colored Converse. He outgrew his standard black ones and I've been waiting to find a pair at the 2nd hand store. Let's cross our fingers and hope! 

Colored shoes and a scarf? My husband would DIE! But I love the combination!

This is more of a Jeremy pleaser. He would hate those mustard skinnies, but love the shirt so I think I could get away with it.  We already have shoes identical which I think would work perfect for all of these outfits.

I was thinking something along these last pictures for Easter. Gray skinnies that could be worn at other times as well with a homemade colorful tie or bow-tie with either a vest or suspenders and a plain button up shirt with a contrast fold-over color. Throw in a super adorable cardigan if it's cool out and we have one cutie on our hands!

Do you boy moms ever feel like it's SUPER hard to find cute boys clothing? I love all of these outfits because I think they are super easy to accomplish while having plenty of room for repurposing pieces and throwing in your own originality and style. If you find one REALLY GREAT piece, BUY IT! You can find a million ways to use one really good piece by pairing it with everyday essentials!

Watch out girls, the boys are back in town and they're taking the fashion world by storm!

And in case you missed my post last week with Henry's new hair-cut, check out how adorbs my little man is looking right now!

What I Remember

This post is going to be hard for me, but I need to get it out and I need to send a message loud and clear about exactly how and why I feel the way that I do.

My mother joined Facebook a little while ago and sent me a friend request. I accepted it willingly, having absolutely no issue with her keeping up with the ins and outs of my life. I've sent her photos of Henry in the past and I'm okay with her being involved in our lives in this way, I'm just not comfortable with anything more.

What bugs me is her constant comments of 'this is my grand-baby', 'I just love him', and 'I would love to see him'. She has a right to express her feelings, but I may just be cruel enough to not want to hear it.

This is why:

My first memory of her is being told by my father and who I believed was my mother that my brother and I had a different mother. I remember crying. I remember begging that I wouldn't have to see her, that my life wouldn't have to change this way.

I remember having a decent summer or two with her. We went to Sea World and swam in a blow-up pool and had a good time. I remember her sitting in the yard at her trailer and crying when my father picked us up and took us back home. We still saw her on some weekends, but then it stopped again.

I remember not hearing from her for awhile.

I remember her stealing my dad's wallet and me taking the entire blame for it after my brother told me that he had helped her and asked me to tell my father and the police. My dad yelled and screamed and told me to get out of his house.

I remember not hearing from her again for a long time.

I remember her telling me one time after not seeing me for months that I needed to lose my 'muffin-top' and then I would look good. I was maybe 14. Thanks for the help with the self-image!

I remember her telling me that she would help buy my graduation invitations and then blowing me off after we spent an entire day running here and there while she did errands.

I remember sending an invitation to my graduation and my graduation party in which she didn't attend.

I remember sending an invitation to my wedding and reception in which she didn't attend.

I remember calling to try and keep in touch and finally reaching her from time to time and then never hearing from her again. It takes effort from both sides.

I remember her family members contacting me telling me how much she wanted to be in my life, acting like I was just holding some sort of grudge and almost trying to guilt-trip me into letting her come and go in my life as she always choose when I was growing up. No thank you.

And through out my life when I needed a mother:

I remember being scared when I started my period because I had no one there to tell me what was happening or what to do.

I remember teaching myself how to do my hair and make-up because I had no one there to teach me.

I remember feeling like I wasn't worth someone's love.

I remember getting hurt by careless decisions because I dressed far too old for my age and chased after boys thinking that they could make me feel that love.

I remember hanging out with people who did little more than pound any self-worth I had into the ground. I was literally made fun of almost daily at the age of 14 because I was still a virgin. 

I remember feeling guilty because my dad was stuck with this girl that he had no idea what to do with.

I remember one of my teachers at school pulling me to the side to give me deodorant and face-wash because  no one had ever told me that I needed them.

I remember being dirt-poor and going without essentials because I was too ashamed to ask anyone else for them and my dad paid out so much child-support but got none in return. 

(He's not completely innocent in all of this either, but at least he constantly tried.)

I remember my grandmother being there to step in, pay my entire way through high-school, graduation, class trips, sports, field-trips and teaching me how to be an respectable lady. She was there when I got engaged, married, pregnant...when I moved, when I needed someone to talk to or when I needed advice.

I didn't have much of a mother and I'm not trying to be mean. I just don't understand where she thinks she can just come into my life and expect so much trust and openness with me. I am not angry with her, I am just cautious and too aware of the pain and that is not likely to change anytime soon.

As far as her grandson goes, now I can choose to PROTECT him. I can choose not to allow his life and feelings to be on the line with a grandmother who claims she loves him and wants to see him but claimed the same with her very own children in which she abandoned. I know that I can not protect my son from everything in life, but right now, I feel like I can protect him from this.

If you made it through all of that, I'm sorry that this post is not all rainbows and sunshine. I live a wonderful life and I am a normal human-being. I am not a product of my parents because I have made the decision to live my life the way that I feel is right. I am grateful for those who stepped in in my life and helped me get by some of the hard times, I'm just struggling right now with this constant reminder that I am choosing to keep Henry from my mother while she wishes I wouldn't. I just feel it is what's best.

 

Cuteness Overload

Someone got his hair cut today!

So What!

It's Wednesday which means it's time to link up with Shannon for another SWW! 
So What! if...
-I'm posting this at 9 p.m. Life has just been busy lately.
-I bought Henry red skinny jeans today knowing that Jeremy would absolutely hate them. He'll look stinkin' adorable in them and I can't wait to put them on him.
-There are days that I feel moments away from a break-down. I carry some heavy baggage.
-I have about 6 projects started that I need to finish and some of them I need to finish NOW because I was hoping to sell them for Easter baskets. I swear I need a full-time nanny and maid in order to get anything else accomplished anymore.
-Henry went pee on his potty every single day, some times two or three times a day for a 5 day period and now he just won't go. The kid likes to mess with my head.
-I change my mind weekly about whether or not I'd like to have a girl one day. Girls are great and all and I quite like being female myself, but I just don't see myself being a good 'girl' mom.
-I'm too hard on myself. There, I said it.
-I want to watch this week's episode of The Bachelor so bad but I'm trying to save it until Henry's nap tomorrow so I can just sit down, watch what I want to watch and relax for a couple of hours.
-I only go to Kroger when I have a handful of 'free' coupons that are about to expire. I don't know why but I hate Kroger. I'll do my shopping at Meijer, thank you.
-You do not want to get me started about my hatred for Wal-Mart.
-This SWW could go on and on and on and on. I think I'll just stop while I'm ahead.

On A Whim

Before Jeremy and I were blessed with Henry, we were quite known for picking up on a whim and taking off somewhere for a night, a few days or even a week. We've never sat down and actually 'planned' a vacation and aside from going on two cruises, we've rarely even known a little more than our planned destination when we left our home. So when I came home from work an hour late on Sunday, exhausted (I had to help unload a truck) and Jeremy was bored out of his mind, I wasn't planning on doing anything more than kicking up my feet and sending him out to pick up some dinner. Then the words left my mouth...

"Is the Chicago Auto Show still going on?"

An hour later we were all in the car, packed and headed towards the windy city without a second thought. That's just how we work.

I did all the driving. I'm a more cautious driver and Jeremy is pretty much blind when it comes to driving at night. I drove until 3 a.m. our time and then just couldn't do it anymore. We found a place to stay an hour outside of Chicago and crashed for about 4 hours.

Henry and I shared a bed while Daddy got his own. We were too tired to care.

Hello Chicago!

For once we were going somewhere that I had been and Jeremy had not. It scared him to be driving to and through a 'big' city like Chicago, but I reminded him that we'd been through Atlanta and Miami with no issues and I remembered Chicago as being way easier to navigate anyway. Once we got there and got lost downtown trying to find the auto show parking, he was at ease - he has a fantastic driver for a wife.  ;)

We loved the  Kia Hamsters!

We enjoyed the auto show but agreed that Detroit's was better. We did however score half-price tickets which was awesome! Once we left the show, we found Michigan Avenue and drove the magnificent mile, drove past the Navy Pier as well as the bean and Lincoln Park.

Michigan Avenue!

We would have loved to have stayed and explored more, but with Jeremy needing to be at work Tuesday morning, we figured we'd better grab some dinner and make the trip home. We figured when in Chicago, you HAVE to get a Chicago style deep-dish pizza, so we looked up the place with the highest rating on Google and stopped. It was delicious and we brought half of it home. I'm looking forward to leftovers for lunch today.

Lou Malnati's Pizza!

I had promised Jeremy (upon another quick trip up Michigan Avenue) that I could get us home by 11 p.m. so that he could get some sleep before work. We pulled into the driveway at 10:58. Hey Jeremy... told ya so!  ;)

Today I am in recovery mode. I'm exhausted and sore from so much work and driving the past few days but I'm feeling refreshed and happy that we got away for at least a night. It's done nothing but snow today here and it's been just perfect. I'm looking forward to returning to the windy city another time!

How was your weekend? Do you guys ever pick up and go on a whim or do you have to plan every trip out?

P.S. - Thank you all for the prayers and support about the position at work. Upon many long talks and prayer, Jeremy and I decided that one of us being home with Henry full-time is more important to us at this time. With the possibility of a second little one joining us in the future, we'd rather I be working outside of the home on a minimum level. There will always be full-time jobs available in the future and this was what we decided was best for now. Thank you again for your prayers in this decision, I feel completely happy and at peace with what we've decided.

Torn

I have an opportunity to take a full-time job that I would be a perfect fit for me at work. This would increase my pay anywhere from $4 to $8 an hour, depending on a few small details. It would also mean me no longer getting to stay home with Henry every day during the week. I talked to a friend who has a daughter a month older than Henry, and she would be willing to babysit the days I would work during the week when both Jeremy and I would be working. It would equal about 11 to 15 days a month away from me.

I would gain 3 days a month of 'family time' that Jeremy and I would both have off together which we have none of now. Our insurance would also improve immensely.

The biggest issue is that I have to make up my mind by tomorrow because there are already 10 others at work applying for the job and the position closes tomorrow.

I'm completely stressed out about the situation, like sick-to-my-stomach feeling, because I don't know what to do. So please say a prayer for me tonight and tomorrow that I will be guided in the correct direction and I will greatly, GREATLY appreciate it.

The 14th of February

Happy Valentine's Day everyone! I hope your day is filled with lots of love, happy thoughts and bear hugs! 

Henry and I plan on having a fun day together and then we're all going to spend the evening together as a family. This will mark four years ago that Jeremy and I celebrated our marriage with our family and friends.

Our marriage was spur of the moment so had our reception on our original wedding date (yes, Valentine's Day) and celebrated with our friends and family then. I was lucky enough to get to wear my wedding dress twice and our tables were adorned with our actual wedding photos. In after-thought, I really enjoyed having our wedding and reception this way. We had been married for 2 months, already been on our honeymoon and we really got to enjoy our reception. We were able to go out later that night with family that was in from town and spend time with those who made a special trip instead of running off just to focus on 'us'.

One day we'll renew our vows in front of them all and they'll get to share that part of our wedding/marriage with us. But the intimate setting in which we were actually married was perfect and those who were invited (just immediate family) I think will tell you that our wedding was beautiful, even if it wasn't full of other people, decorations and so on...

13) He pauses the tv when I leave the room, even if it’s just for a second, because he doesn’t want me to miss anything.

14) He goes to bed with me almost every night, no matter how early (or late) it may be.

15) He cuddles Henry every night before bed.

16) He reads Henry stories in that 'reading' voice that is both super silly and super embarrassing.

17) He shares my interests in history and overall ‘old’ things.

18) He lets me hog the covers.