Worth Fighting For & Why I Love My Husband

A little over two years ago, Jeremy and I hit a rough spot. Being young, a couple of years into our marriage with no children, and barely the time between work and school to look at one another, we almost called it quits. The big 'D' word was thrown around quite a bit for a good week and I even went as far as to pack a small bag, certain that I would leave and not return unless it was to get the rest of my belongings.

But my husband and I - we are not quitters. We sat down, like the young-adults we were, and discussed the situation, our feelings and whether or not we had really given our marriage a fighting chance. 

We hadn't. 

Let's be honest, most people anymore give up without out even really trying first.

So we attempted to fix the 'light bulb'. We asked for a few mentors to pray for us daily, we talked about how we were really feeling and we took 'The Love Dare' together.

On day 40, our marriage had been transformed into something beautiful again. You can read my post from that day here. 

The truth was, we hadn't even tried to fight for our marriage . We had let the world around us tell us that something 'better' was out there and that a 'failed' marriage is just the way things are.

But we knew better.

We knew that our marriage was worth fighting for.

We are selfish creatures by nature and anytime that I start to feel unhappy about our marriage, I stop, I talk about it and then I reevaluate what I am doing in our marriage. Most of the time, the feelings I am having stem from my own insecurities and feelings of discontent because I'm the one who's failed as a Godly, caring and present wife.

When I'm struggling to hold on, my prayer is always that God will show ME how I've failed. Pointing fingers and blame only causes more harm. I'm happy to say that although there are rough spots and days when I feel ignored and at the bottom of the priority list, I know my marriage is worth fighting for. And as long as my husband will fight with me, I know that we will have a beautiful marriage that will withstand any kind of bumps in the road.

Why I Love My Husband (The Never-Ending List)

7) He considers our marriage worth fighting for.

8) He always kisses me goodbye.

9) He tells everyone how important his wife and son are to him.

10) He fixes everything that I break.

11) He plays into my home-improvement 'fantasies'.

12) He takes out the trash, shovels the walks and mows the lawn - all so that I don't have to.

Jenn's Jams, thrifty finds & Legos

First, this song: Ed Sheeran - Lego House

I'm gonna pick up the pieces,

And build a Lego house

If things go wrong we can knock it down

My three words have two meanings,

There's one thing on my mind

It's all for you

And it's dark in a cold December, but I've got you to keep me warm

If you're broken I will mend you and I'll keep you sheltered from the storm that's raging on now

I'm out of touch, I'm out of love

I'll pick you up when you're getting down

And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

I'm out of sight, I'm out of mind

I'll do it all for you in time

And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

I'm gonna paint you by numbers

And color you in

If things go right we can frame it and put you on a wall

And it's so hard to say it but I've been here before

Now I'll surrender up my heart

And swap it for yours

I'm out of touch, I'm out of love

I'll pick you up when you're getting down

And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

I'm out of sight, I'm out of mind

I'll do it all for you in time

And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

Don't hold me down

I think my braces are breaking, and it's more than I can take

And it's dark in a cold December, but I've got you to keep me warm

If you're broken I will mend you and I'll keep you sheltered from the storm that's raging on now

I'm out of touch, I'm out of love

I'll pick you up when you're getting down

And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

I'm out of sight, I'm out of mind

I'll do it all for you in time

And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

----------

This could probably be called 'Jeremy's Jams' this morning because he sent this song to me after he left for work. He's sweet like that sometimes. =)  I found Henry two boxes of Legos on clearance yesterday for $4 and a bag of mega blocks for $5 and all we've done is play with them since I brought them home. Especially me. Don't hate - one of the best things about having kids is getting to play with all of the awesome toys again, guilt free!

What is your kids favorite toys? Henry likes anything with wheels but other than his blankets, I can't say he's really 'attached' to anything.

Brilliant, just brilliant.

I'm here to make your Friday with the most brillantly ridiculous thing I've seen in quite some time! I present to you....

Scottish ponies wearing sweaters!

You can go here for the full story, although really.. the picture is enough! Don't you think? These cute little ponies are part of Scotland's newest campaign to get people to visit. I think it will work because HELLO! I totally want to go to Scotland now! Haha! I hope you all have a great weekend! I promise to take too many photos this weekend and come back Monday with a full recap on our weekend trip! Happy Friday!!

P.S. - Sorry for all the exclamation points this morning. I skipped the coffee but I feel as if I must have drank a gallon in my sleep!

A Good Day & Why I Love My Husband

It's a good day to have a good day... and don't let anyone else tell you otherwise! 

It's been dreadfully cold here in Ohio this week and despite a trip or two out, Henry and I have stayed indoors, warm as two bugs in a rug. It snowed a bit last night and I'd love to take him out to play in it but again: dreadfully cold. I'm feeling a little claustrophobic however and while I have NO idea what we're going to do today, we're getting out of here. We have passes to the discovery museum so maybe we'll make a trip down that way. Who knows!!

Anyway, I just wanted to wish you all a Happy Thursday and ask for some prayers. My husband's great aunt passed away last week and her funeral is tomorrow. I didn't really know her and I only met her once, maybe twice, but my husband has very fond memories of her and I know that his grandfather has to be heart-broken over the loss of his sister. So please say a little prayer for my husband's side of the family tomorrow.

Also, I wanted to join in the fun and start this (never-ending) list of Why I Love My Husband! Click the button and you can link-up every Thursday over at the Happy Wives Club too if you so wish!

Why I Love My Husband (The Never-Ending List)

1) He picks me up from work most every Sunday to take me out to lunch.

2) He eats whatever I put in front of him (which can be dangerous sometimes, I know).

3) He works hard so I can stay home through-out the week with our son.

4) He kisses me daily.

5) He encourages me to follow my dreams.

6) He's always my biggest fan.

Be Patient and KNOW that I am God!

We can all get frustrated with waiting for that next 'big' thing. When we're younger, we can't wait to turn 16, then 18. We can't wait to start driving, move out...get married. We can't wait to start a family, buy a home, get the big promotion we've worked so hard for. In all this rushing to get to the next 'big' thing, we can often forget that God has a plan for our lives and our plans do not always coincide with His.

We will cry out, pray, complain, wish, dream and just plain out feel fed-up when what we think should be happening just isn't. We are truly creatures of want; constantly wanting something more and more, no matter how blessed we are!

I am more than guilty of being a creature of want. Instead of praising God for what I have, I find myself often asking him 'why not now?' when it comes to what I THINK should be my next 'big' thing.

I have made it very known that Jeremy and I are trying to conceive and grow our little family from three to four. As I was making the hour drive home from my weekly trip to see my grandmother yesterday, Henry was snoring in the backseat and the radio was tuned to my favorite station, but my mind was elsewhere - talking to God. (God and I, we hang out in the car. I don't know why but that is OUR place!) I used to think that people were crazy when they would say 'God spoke to me..' and go into detail about what He would say. I always felt like God spoke to the heart and while you could have a feeling as to what He was saying, you'd never actually be able to cipher his exact words out of those feelings. So untrue. God can speak to you and while you may not hear an audible voice, it's very clear as to what He's saying.

So God and I were having a little chat and being the creature of want that I am, I was asking Him why it seemed like everyone else was getting pregnant but I wasn't. (Yeah, comparisons...already making a mistake there, right?) And as I was pouring my heart out about how badly I wanted another baby, I looked up and saw my sleeping beauty in the rear-view mirror and just stopped. And God said, "look at what you already have...quit working so hard towards the next and cherish this one for a little while longer" and I couldn't say another word. Thanks Father, thanks for putting me back in my place...

If we would quit focusing on the next big thing, quit wishing for more, dreaming for more...and focus on what God has given us already, we would be in a world of better shape. Faith includes faith in His timing, which is perfect timing. His ultimate plans are to grow us for Him and to Him and we must trust that His plans and His timing are what we need.

Today I'm praying to have patience and faith to trust God's timing. Completely.

Security & Trust

Do you ever have those 'ah-ha' moments where suddenly something, out of no where, makes a whole bunch of sense? Moments where you sit back and smile and say, "God, I see what you did there. I get it...and thank you."? I had one of those moments on Sunday as I was driving to work. I've been thinking a lot about my relationship with my husband and how I can be a better wife for him. My prayer has been that God would show me my flaws, how I can improve them and to enlighten me as to why my husband and I work so well together. And like God always does, He pulled through and showed me a major factor to our marriage that I had really been taking granted.

Before I met my husband, I was not a secure person. I often questioned the intentions of my boyfriends, friends and even my family. I had seen enough in my life to know that it was easy to lie and even easier to hurt someone, especially when their intentions had started out good. But something about Jeremy was different; I trusted his word to a fault, I never doubted him and I never doubted his intentions.

I still don't.

God showed this to me on Sunday. He placed this little tid-bit of information in front of me and said, "Look. I gave you someone you could trust, someone who you would never doubt." Then He asked me some tough questions: "Did you forget? Isn't this what you asked for?"

And it was...and I had forgotten. I hadn't forgotten that this is what I had prayed for, but I had forgotten the feelings growing up and dating of constant heart-break and mistrust. I had forgotten the many times that I began to trust just to have those feelings ripped from beneath me. I had forgotten the lies and the cheating and the constant reminder that I felt alone in the world.

What God gave me when He gave me my husband was like the missing piece of a puzzle that I had been searching for all of my life. He gave me security. He gave me someone whom I know I will never have to doubt. That's a big deal these days when all you hear about is infidelity, lying between spouses and complete mistrust. I was blessed enough to find someone who will always be truthful and loyal to me and I had taken that for granted for almost the entirety of our relationship.

It's easy to see the flaws in someone when that's all that you're looking for. But when you start to realize the good traits that someone possesses, you'll usually find that you're blessed beyond measures. Praise God for answered prayers... and husbands like mine. ♥

18 Months

Henry turned 18 months old on Saturday. Someone please fib a little and tell me that time will slow down for us a bit from now on. I can't imagine him turning two in six short months; they grow up way too fast.

I wouldn't call these his 'formal' 18 month photos, but I had about 20 minutes before needing to run out the door for work on Friday so we had a bit of an impromptu photoshoot on the kitchen table.

He was enjoying the warmth of the sunshine and I was enjoying the warmth of his laugh and smile. He loves these blocks, they're older than dirt and have been played with and abused over the years but that's how we prefer things around here; aged to perfection.

At 18 months of age Henry loves anything with wheels. He'll chase the dogs with his shopping car, roll his hotwheels around the house or flip over one of his larger toy cars so he can play with the wheels. I can already tell that he is going to be mechanical like his Daddy. He loves to eat bananas, jello, chocolate, french fries and fruit snacks (what kid doesn't). If given the choice, he'd give up the sippy cup and go straight to a regular cup, but we're still a bit messy for all that. He eats with a fork and refuses to eat if he doesn't have one. His favorite thing is his blankets and you can often find him dragging two or three of them around at a time. He loves to play in water (and snow). He loves to flip through the pages on his books and watch us point and count to ten. He loves to go down the slide, backwards, on his belly. If given the choice, he'd spend every waking moment outdoors. He barks with the dogs, screams and hollers, says 'mom' and 'dad', 'love you' and a few other little words. He refuses to really talk, the kid is stubborn, but he points to his body parts (pulling up his shirt and showing us his belly button is his favorite). He climbs on everything and is afraid of nothing. He walks up and down the stairs by himself with the help of the railing and loves to rock himself in his rocking chair. He sits on his potty on his own but has only gone in it once. He may watch Mickey Mouse for about 10 minutes, but he doesn't really pay much attention to the television.  He's become more attached to Mommy (but still usually prefers Daddy) and often wants to cuddle in the evening time. He loves to share with everyone but Mommy and Daddy, especially other kids. He's begun to show more affection towards his grandparents as well, which has to be one of the cutest things ever.

Overall I just have a rambunctious, curious, typical boy who is always into something. He is perfect - in every single way. Happy 18 months Little Bit!

A Little Makeover!

It took me a good three hours of browsing, creating and tweaking...but the blog has had a makeover and I absolutely LOVE it! I needed more color around this place!

New Year: New Everything

This post may be a little late (or maybe not, I did post my resolutions in a timely fashion) but it's something I've been thinking about a lot the past few weeks and I decided to jump with it.

I am fed up. Plainly put.

I am ready for little changes that can hold a BIG impact on my life. What sort of changes you ask?

Changes like kissing my husband more, watching TV less and spending more time with God. Changes like accepting myself for the person that I am (inside and out) and appreciating the 'why' more often. Changes like making new friends and putting myself out there, trying new things and figuring out what truly makes me happy. Changes like kicking rocks at jealously and painful wishing that I could be more like someone else, because Hello! I am a child of the King! I want to reflect more. That part should be easy. And be honest - brutally so. That part? Not so easy.

So if things seem a little different around here in the coming weeks, months and year...you have had your warning. I want to be me and in figuring out who I am, I want to also better that person. I want to be comfortable, happy and content with the person God created and when I look in the mirror I want to know who that person is looking back and her purpose in this world.

Wonderful Days

I had a wonderful day today.

I got up far too early, but I watched the sunrise and it made me smile.
I made Henry and I a wonderful breakfast of spinach and bacon eggs.
I cleaned house: swept, mopped, did laundry and dishes.
I did an hour of Zumba and felt like a complete idiot because I'm pretty sure the men working across the street saw the entire thing through my window (don't really care).
I spent a wonderful afternoon with a good friend and her daughter at the Boonshoft museum.
I made us a yummy dinner of baked chicken, asparagus (my favorite) and hominy (Jeremy's favorite).
We said goodbye to Jeremy's childhood cat, Stinky. He lived a long, happy life and I'm fairly certain that he died peacefully.

I'm now curled up on the couch with my husband, son and both dogs, warm, full and happy. Life is full of ups and downs, challenges and thankfully - wonderful days.

We are blessed.

Growing Love

As human beings we are flawed. There is not a one of us that are perfect, no... not one. Sometimes we think that we are perfect, and we place ourselves on pedestals higher than others whom we view as less perfect. But the truth is that we are not, and will not ever be, perfect. So why do we expect our husbands to be?

I have been knocked off of my high horse several times lately. I think (no, I know) that God is trying to teach me a lesson about why I may be so unhappy at times as a married woman. It is not because my husband has changed is such crazy ways that the man that I would have sworn was my soul-mate for life five years ago is now someone so completely different that I just can't possibly be happy with him. No, it's not him, it me and my horrible attitude and view of my him.

When I nag him to pick up his shoes and socks after a long day of work, I should actually be grateful that he came straight home after working all day to support me and our family. When I get angry because he questions what I'm doing on my phone or computer, I should actually realize he's not questioning my intentions but is actually interested in my likes/dislikes. When I snap at him after I've had a long day and he won't quit talking, I should actually be grateful that he's inquiring about my day, showing concern and love for the woman he married.

Why are we so quick to judge, to temper and to pick out flaws? Well..the answer is simple, we are human. My main resolution for 2013 was to be more present in my life and to learn to appreciate what I have in a deeper, more meaningful way. I want that appreciation to start with my husband. I am so lucky to have him and I don't thank God for him enough. My main goal this week is to simply begin to view my husband as the man that he is and was when we first met. I want that giddy love, that 'I can't wait to see him' and 'I want to know everything' feeling to return. And I know it can. It just takes effort on my part to realize that he hasn't changed so much, I've just become less attentive to him.

Whatever you nurture, that is the thing that will inevitably grow.

ABC's

I saw this over at Mouse in the Kitchen and thought it looked fun so I decided to join in! Go ahead and steal it for yourself if you'd like, it's always fun to get to know one another a little more!

{A} Age: 25 going on 60!

{B} Bed size: King, as of last year - and I was just thinking last night how it doesn't matter whether you have a twin sized bed or a king sized bed, you'll still have your one year old's knees and elbows in your back all night long!

{C} Chore you hate: Folding and putting away laundry, I despise it! 

{D} Dogs: Two dachshunds, two years apart - Mason and Cohen.

{E} Essential start to your day: Just two minutes to myself, whether that be laying in bed or hiding in the bathroom!

{F} Favorite color: Orange, followed by pink, blue and green. I hate picking one anymore!

{G} Gold or Silver: Silver. Gold is great too, but I prefer silver.

{H} Height: 5' 3"

{I} Instruments you play: None really. I can tap out a tune or two on a keyboard and guitar, but nothing substantial on anything.

{J} Job Title: Full-time mom, part-time photographer/creator and part-time Lowe's associate.

{K} Kids: One precious Henry who is turning 1 1/2 in a few days. =( 

{L} Live: Ohio.

{M} Married: December 23, 2008. Five years this year! 

{N} Nicknames: Jenn, which is what I go by so I'm not sure it qualifies as a nickname.

{O} Overnight hospital stays: Only one and I felt like I was there for an eternity waiting and then welcoming our little one.

{P} Pet peeve: Complete ignorance.

{Q} Quote:  "Love never fails you..."

{R} Righty or Lefty: Righty.

{S} Siblings: Too many to count? I have 4 brothers ages 24, 21, 16 and 13. One sister age 13. And one sister-in-law, who is 32ish? I love them all, even if some of them drive me batty sometimes.

{T} Time you wake up: 7:00 a.m on the weekends, 8:00 a.m during the week.

{U} University attended: Sinclair, no degree....maybe one day?

{V} Vegetables you dislike: Raw onions, cooked they are wonderful. That's about it.

{W} What makes you run late: The dogs, the kid, the husband...

{X} X-Rays you've had: None. 

{Y} Yummy food: Skyline. Yum!

{Z} Zoo animal favorite: Giraffes! 

Circumcisions, minimizing, and reasons as to why I'm so odd.

My life is strange. I know this, I've accepted this and I've even began to welcome this with open arms. So when I called my dad yesterday for the first time in about six months and he told me he'd just had surgery, I was pretty alarmed. Then when he told me the surgery was actually a circumcision, I didn't know whether to laugh or just hang up the phone immediately. So I did neither. I sat in stunned silence while he went on about how it was something he always wanted done and how he was still bleeding and wasn't sure if that was a good thing and needed someone to go get his antibiotics...jibber, jibber, jabber. All I could think was that I couldn't believe my father just told me this and that I'd rather have not known. But my dad - well, he's honest to a fault most of the time. (No Santa in our house growing up!) So I've come to accept that he doesn't have a filter, or the ability to be embarrassed. Between him and my husband, my ability to become embarrassed has quickly diminished over the years as well. I mean, it can still happen - but it takes a LOT and it's not very often.

If you ever meet my husband, you will immediately understand.

Going in a different direction here, I've decided to begin spring cleaning with a minimalist's frame of mind. I saw this article that challenged you to minimize your personal possessions down to 100 things. This didn't include items shared by the family, books or household items such as dishes and such, but I thought it was wonderful. I'm pretty sure there is no way I could minimize my own personal items to 100 things, I probably own 100 pieces of clothing myself (and then some). But as I'm going through the house, I want to get rid of a A LOT and that's going to be hard for me because I tend to attach memories to things. Sooo...I'm going to go into this thinking, 'is this 1 of the 100 things I would keep' and if it isn't, at least ponder as to whether or not it proves any kind of real use to us as a family. We'd like to expand our family and I just want to de-clutter as much from our lives as possible. Our house isn't very large and we lack some serious storage (We have a whopping total of 4 closets in the entire house, and one of them is barely big enough for a vacuum cleaner) so I need to do this. Wish me luck.

I began to think, what are some 'for sure' items on my list and this is what I have so far (in random order). What 'for sure' items would be on your list of 100?

1.) My willow tree collection.
2.) My cell phone.
3.) My grandfather's hat.
4.) My computer.
5.) My wallet.
6.) Green purse.
7.) Brown purse.
8.) My camera and lenses.
9.) My wedding rings.
10.) My crochet hooks.
11.) My mason jars.
12.) My grey peacoat.
13.) My sewing machine.
14.) My art supplies.
15.) My necklace/earrings with Henry's birthstone.

You can see how this would add up quickly. It said you could count collections as one 'item' but after I thought about it, I guess I don't really collect much. Do you collect anything?

Beautiful Things

Do not tell me that music cannot speak to you, inspire you or move you. I often find myself feeling closest to God while I'm driving down the road with my radio turned up and this morning was no exception. I suppose I needed to hear this song, to be reminded that I am being made new and that in that process, I am also being made beautiful.

Disney

Jeremy and I have been discussing when the 'ideal' age would be to take Henry to Disney World. I say 6, but I also have to take in consideration the possiblity of us having another child (hopefully) in the next year. So, perhaps the youngest would be 5 or 6?

What is your opinion? If you were only going to take your children to Disney once, maybe twice, in their liftetimes, when would you take them?

So What!

It's been a little while since I linked up for a SWW, but I'm trying to get back into the swing of things and SWW is a good way to do that (how many times have I said that?). So this week I'm saying So What! if:
- I have done little to nothing since Christmas. I've gotten by with the bare minimum lately and I'm totally okay with that.
- I'm already overwhelmed with the amount of things on my 'to do' list for 2013. I kept my resolutions to a minimum, but my to-do list is at least a mile long. I have an entire year though, right?
- I can't think of a single place that I REALLY want to go on vacation in the next month or so. I know it should be warm (and with sand).
- I've ate like a pig since Christmas. We've had leftovers on top of leftovers and I made way, wayyy too much food. It's been delicious though, it's stuff that we don't eat really for the rest of the year.
- I hate tv more and more everyday. It's so boring and most of it is just trash anyway. There's still a couple of shows that I love, but even they don't hold my complete interest.
- I have spoiled myself with borrowing books from the library on my phone and they changed the app and the way things work and it's made me soooo angry. You now have to read the books in your browser, which is nearly impossible. I guess I'll have to either buy a Kindle or start going back to the library again.
- I'm super optimistic about this month. For a particular reason. That I am not sharing right now.  ;)

2013 Resolutions

I hate making resolutions, mostly because I am horrible at making commitments and horrible at carrying things through. At least I know it and can admit it, right? So I'm keeping my resolutions simple this year, mostly because I don't want to join the line of people in 2014 who didn't keep any of theirs.

In 2013, my main resolution is be more appreciative. I want to appreciate the precious time I have with Henry more, the work that my husband does for me more, and the love that my grandmother offers me more (just to name a few). Essentially I want to ring in 2014 with a new appreciation for life in general and when I'm frustrated with my mess of a house, I want to appreciate the fact that I have a mess of a house instead of being so frustrated. I also want to learn to appreciate myself more. Most of the time I view myself as undeserving of any sort of appreciation and I know that's not right. Momma deserves to be appreciated too, ya know?

My second resolution is kinda of a two-for-one deal. I want to unplug and be present more often. We all know what I'm talking about - we sit in the same room with our husbands and kids but we're not actually there, one of us is on the computer, another on their phone and another watching tv. I want to have more game nights, cook dinner with my husband more often and just enjoy being  a family together. There is nothing on the computer or tv that is more important than time with those I love - and life is so short, I just want to learn to make the most of it.

Those are my resolutions for 2013. Pretty simple, right? Still, I know they will be challenging at times. We have a couple of 'big' goals as a family for twenty-thirteen as well; we want to have another baby, we want to side the house and we want to potty-train Henry. As of today, the first of January, we've already started working on all three! Go us, right?

What are your goals and resolutions for 2013? Are you keeping it simple this year too?